When Happily Ever After Ends
by Sanishou
Summary: If Saya had chosen Solomon, where would that leave her devoted Chevalier? This is what happens if Saya's choice had been different, leaving Haji to pick up the pieces of his life after she's gone. AU, HajixOC
1. The Choice, The Consequence

**Hello readers! I am still working on Consequences and have chapter 5 nearly done, but I've gotten big time into this show, Blood+ and wanted to try my hand at a story for it. This story is mostly Haji centric, so all you Haji fans, I hope you like it!**

"Blah" - Talking

'Blah' - Thinking

**Disclaimer:** As per usual, I do not own Blood+ or it's characters, just my own plot and Oc.

* * *

><p>A cool breeze whips dark strands of hair against a pale face; sad, deep blue eyes are pain filled as he watches his queen lean into the blond man holding her tenderly. His fists clench tightly, trembling slightly as a hand gently caresses her cheek, and the blond nuzzles against her neck. He had just found his queen after she had been kidnapped by Solomon, one of her sister Diva's chevaliers. He had trailed them to this city, following them as close as he could, his mind only on the safety of his queen.<p>

"N-no… this can't... be happening…" he murmurs quietly, unable to tear his eyes away as the queen he pledged his entire life to, had devoted his whole heart to, has just said yes to another. Haji clenches his hands tightly, the claws of his right hand drawing blood from his palm, and his body trembles slightly. He finally drops his gaze from the pair, looking down at his now bleeding hand and sighing. He has always offered Saya his love; his loyalty, everything, and he had thought she returned his feelings. Trying to ignore the stinging in his eyes as he glances back at them, Haji moves slowly across the gravel roof, bending down to pick up his black and silver cello case and slowly swinging it back over his shoulder. The black and silver coffin style case comes to rest on his back as he begins to walk. He reaches the farther edge of the roof, and with one last glance at the pair, he vaults off the ledge and vanishes. He finds himself wandering down the unfamiliar streets, images of what had just happened playing across his mind.

_'__I __don__'__t __understand__…_' he sighs again, just thinking about it breaks his heart further. Echoes of voices in his head sadden him even more, Solomon offering Saya his love and also her dreams, and her leaning into him with a hint of a smile, nodding and leaning in closer, and then his arms are encircling her as he gently kisses her temple. Each is a knife to the heart, the pain only intensifying. Haji starts to run, wanting nothing more than a release from the heartbreak, his cello case lightly bumps his back as he runs but he barely notices, he scarcely notices where he's going, only wanting to get away. So intent on running, Haji doesn't notice his hair has come loose from its tie, or that he has started using his chiropteran speed as he moves through the streets, blurred images passing his peripheral vision. He finally stops on a hill toward the edge of the city, sinking to the ground on his knees, the cello case thumping softly to the grass at his side as he lowers his head, the breeze tossing at his bangs, throwing them over his eyes. He wraps his arms around himself, shivering slightly in the wind as tears slowly begin to trail down his cheeks, his body trembling slightly. Haji tries to stop them, but finds he can't get them to stop running down his cheeks. Normally cold and indifferent, the dark haired chevalier finds himself a victim to silent tears and heart wrenching sobs, unable to gain control of them.

"I can't just abandon him." Saya says as she and Solomon travel through the park on the other side of it. She wants to find Haji and make sure he's okay with her choice, she will always care about him, but she has never felt the same about him as he does about her, he's a dear friend to her, and she had become worried, as she had seen him take off from the rooftop without looking at her. Solomon wraps his arm around her as they walk, nodding and rubbing her side reassuringly as they continue looking for her missing chevalier. Shivering in the wind, Haji lifts his head, it's gotten much colder, and thick, grey clouds have moved in, covering the sky in a fluffy, grey blanket. Haji shivers again, a large raindrop landing on his forehead, making him sigh sadly. With a groan he pushes himself to his feet, retrieving his cello case and starting to walk. By the time he reaches dense trees by the park's edge, it has started to pour. Due to the trees all Saya and Solomon catch of him is his back as he retreats into the trees.

"I hope he's okay." She says softly, the sound and smell of the rain drowning out that of Haji's tears; a breeze blows it away from them as well, making it unnoticeable to her.

"We're getting soaked, let's look more tomorrow." Solomon says, and Saya nods, leaning into him, their arms around each other as they use chiropteran speed to run back to Solomon's place out of the rain. Back at the apartment the Red Shield is using, Kai looks over at the sound of the door, relaxing when he sees that it's only Haji. He watches the dark haired man make his way to the room he had shared with Saya and shutting the door without saying a word.

_'__That__'__s __odd._' Kai frowns, _'__Saya __should __have __been __with __him._' Kai sits back, deciding to ask Haji about it later on when he comes back out. In the room, Haji sets his cello case down in the corner and looks around at the empty space. It feels so much emptier without her there. He sighs and grabs a towel, heading into the side bathroom off their room to take a shower and warm up a bit. Kai soon gets up again, putting a kettle onto the stove to make some tea, knowing Haji and Saya sometimes have some after getting back from a hunt. When he hears the shower running he figures Haji will come out for the tea shortly, and settles back on the couch, and watching Lulu flick through TV channels.

Haji leans his head back as the hot water beats against his skin, one hand braced on the wall, as with a frown he then looks down, gazing at his clawed hand, flexing it a little. He drops his arm, the water pressing his hair against his face, and mingling with the tears that are once again falling.

'_How__… __I __gave __every thing __to __her...__over __100 __years __of __love __and __devotion __to __her__… __and, __what __do __I __get __for __it? __Only __rejection._' He sighs again, soon slumping down so he's sitting in the bottom of the tub, his head resting on his knees, one arm around them, and his clawed hand resting at his side limply as his shoulders tremble with soft sobs, again unable to control them as he isn't used to feeling such strong emotions other than his love for Saya that he's held for so long.

"What do I do now? I've got nothing…" he whispers to himself, barely noticing the water is cooling his skin as it gets colder, until finally he shuts it off and pulls himself to his feet, wrapping a towel around his slim frame and wandering back to the bedroom, drying off and pulling on a pair of loose black pants, and a whitish cream colored shirt out of the small dresser, and then dropping into the chair, tucking his long legs under him. He reaches over and grabs a blanket, pulling it around himself as he curls up in the chair, laying his head down on his knees again, pulling the blanket tightly around himself. He curls up in the chair in a ball, pulling the wool blanket tighter around himself, closing his blue eyes as they sting yet again, and he sighs. He ends up drifting in to a troubled sleep, only to see images from his past with Saya, the times they spent together, just being there for each other, being the other's strength and support through so many years.

"Kai, it's whistling!" Lulu says, knocking on the bathroom door where the redhead had gone.

"Be right out." He says, and she nods, returning to the couch and finding another TV show to watch, curling up. Kai finishes and comes out of the bathroom, moving the kettle off of the stove and pouring water in the pot so the tea leaves can steep. He sets out mugs for himself and Haji, and also for David and Lewis as well, who should be back soon. He also uses a bit of the water to make a hot chocolate for Lulu, carrying the hot mug over and giving it to her, telling her to be careful with it. She nods, sniffing it a bit and setting it onto a coaster on the table to let it cool some. When the tea is ready, he makes up the mugs, and takes Haji's to the door on a tray, setting it on the little table beside it and knocking on the door a couple times to let him know it's there.

Haji opens his eyes at the sound, looking over at the door, but doesn't move. Tea doesn't appeal right now to him. He then looks over at his cello case, and gets up, retrieving it and then returning to his chair, and pulling the blanket back around himself. He opens the case, lightly running his hand along the smooth wood, as he removes it from the case, the polish he so carefully applied gleaming in the light. He sits up, his blanket still around his shoulders as he stands the cello, resting it against him and picking up the bow, beginning to play, as he rests back in the chair, slowly losing himself in the music.

Kai looks over at the door when he hears the music start, but then he frowns, the song is so sad and mournful, nothing at all like the songs Haji normally plays. When David and Lewis arrive with Julia, they frown too, sitting at the table to drink their tea.

"Is Haji alright?" David asks, and Kai says,

"No idea, he came home without Saya and went straight to their room and shut himself in, he hasn't come out yet, even for his tea. The music just started a few minutes ago." David frowns,

"Saya's not here?" and Kai shakes his head, looking back down at his mug. They talk for a bit, and Kai is soon elected, much to his chagrin, to talk to Haji and find out what's going on. Kai sighs, finishing his mug in a last gulp and getting up, rinsing it in the sink, and then heading to the closed bedroom door. He takes a deep breath, and then knocks on the door. Haji looks over, but he doesn't stop playing, his hair still in his face, and his eyes. Kai cracks open the door, asking,

"Haji? Where's Saya gone? Is something wrong?" Haji looks over, and Kai's eyes widen as he sees a lone tear trail down the chevalier's cheek.

"Gone." Haji says simply, continuing to play, even though his hands tremble slightly. Kai frowns,

"Haji, what's going on? Where is Saya and why are you so upset?" The redhead comes into the room a few steps, eyes still on the dark haired man, who has now lowered the cello's bow. Haji turns to look at Kai, he sets down the bow, sighing, and Kai gasps at the torment in the man's deep blue eyes.

"She has gone, gone with that man." Haji says, looking back down at the cello. Kai chews his lip, and a frown comes over his lips.

"You mean Solomon?" he asks, frowning again at the way Haji tenses at the name. Kai sighs, nodding a bit and heading from the room, closing the door behind him. He picks up the tray with Haji's now cold tea, his mind turning over what Haji had told him as he takes it to the kitchen, dumping it and rinsing the mug. David's eyes narrow a bit as Kai comes back, and he says,

"Anything?" and Kai nods, saying softly,

"She chose Solomon, and Haji's devastated." David, Lewis and Julia all gasp, shocked. David frowns a bit, and goes to get up, obviously wanting to get more information out of Haji, but Kai says,

"Leave him be David, he's been hurt enough." And David sighs, but nods, sitting back down. Haji lets a slight smile grace his lips as he hears Kai defend him, but then it drops again, and he soon resumes playing his song on the cello, letting his pain flow into the music.

* * *

><p>Over the next several days, Haji almost never leaves the room, spending his time by himself, playing on his cello, or just curled up in the chair. David managed to contact Saya, and even though she'd chosen to take Solomon she is still willing to fight Diva. After some more talking to Kai, Haji has also agreed to continue with helping them as well, though, he will only now listen to Kai, refusing to talk to or listen to any other member of the Red Shield. Currently, Kai is reading a book, settled in the chair in Haji's room while the chevalier sleeps in the bed; Kai has taken to keeping a bit of an eye on his friend, worried about him. He knows Haji is not taking the loss of Saya well at all, and Kai can understand why. He knows Haji has been at her side for over a century of loyal service, always being there for her, serving her, loving her, and to have it all suddenly torn from him so painfully, he doesn't know how to cope. Kai has seen him crying once since the day he came back, and he made sure no one else came near Haji, letting him have his space and privacy, and standing up for him whenever they want to try and force information from him, hence the reason Haji now only talks to and listens to Kai, not all the others. Haji stirs, and Kai looks over, frowning, the chevalier is dreaming again, likely more memories of his past with Saya, which would explain his pained expression.<p>

"This must be so hard for you Haji, to keep fighting for us and knowing she isn't." He whispers, sadly, sighing some and stretching. Haji groans a bit in his sleep and turns onto his back, quieting some. Kai watches him, his eyes are sad and worried, and then he soon goes back to his book, he figures being in here he can stop anyone who tries to come in and bother Haji. He also has the door cracked open, and he can hear them out in the kitchen talking about Diva's pregnancy and how to proceed, now that David is strong enough to continue fighting again, having recovered from his gunshot wound. Kai gets up a bit later, heading from the room, being careful to shut the door quietly, heading into the kitchen, when suddenly Lulu catches him around the legs.

"Karman's missing!" she says, begging him to help her find him. Kai frowns and nods.

"Alright, just let me change quickly." Lulu nods, watching him head back the way he came. Kai peeks into Haji's room, noticing the chevalier is now awake and sitting against the headboard, knees drawn up to his chest, and his chin resting on them, dark hair framing his face.

"Hey Haji, would you… like to help me find Karman?" Haji is silent a moment, and then nods, pulling a shirt on as he moves to the edge of the bed. Kai nods and changes in his own room, and he meets Haji over by the door. Haji nods, his cello case over his shoulder, and they head out. Lulu waits at the apartment for them, hoping they find her friend. Upon arriving at the park, Kai says,

"Haji, you take the west side, I'll take the east." Haji nods, and the two split up, taking off to look for Karman. Kai watches Haji go a moment, and then starts looking himself, hoping their friend is okay. Haji moves through the park, eyes and senses alert for the missing Schiff. He adjusts his cello case, traveling near some of the forest's edge as he searches, and then he suddenly freezes. Standing not fifteen feet away is Saya.

"Haji…" she says softly, making her chevalier tense, the knuckles of his hand clutching at the leather strap of his cello case turning white. Saya chews her lip, saying softly,

"I'm sorry Haji, please, will you forgive me?" Haji looks away, hair falling into his eyes.

"Don't." he says, his voice quiet, but laced with pain. Saya frowns, knowing she's hurt him badly, their friendship might even be over, but she will not deny her heart any longer. She watches Haji a moment more, an uneasy but resigned frown coming to her lips as she watches Haji back away, and then turn and take off. With a sigh, she continues on as well, she needs to meet back up with Solomon; they're searching for Karman too, in response to Lulu coming and asking them as well.

After searching all day, Kai finally heads back to the apartment, figuring Haji will likely head back to there as well. Kai sighs, he's worried about Haji, and he's also worried about Karman too, especially since they haven't found him yet. Upon arriving back at the apartment, Kai frowns when he hears yelling. He frowns and goes inside, his eyes widening when he sees David holding a despondent Haji against the wall, yelling at him and demanding to know where Saya is. Kai notices that every time he says her name, Haji visibly flinches; his pained blue eyes turn to Kai, who becomes angry.

"That's enough, David!" He snaps and marches over, grabbing the blond and pulling him off of Haji as well. Haji glances at Kai, and then disappears into his room, shutting the door with a snap. Kai sighs as David's angry footsteps head back into the kitchen, and he goes to Haji's door, knocking a couple times.

"It's me, Haji." He says softly, and he hears a quiet

"Come in." Kai nods and pushes open the door a bit, giving Haji a sympathetic look.

"You okay?" he asks, worry in his eyes. Haji is curled up on the chair, knees drawn up to his chest, his arms around them, the blanket pulled tightly around him as he leans into the back of the chair. Kai's eyes grow wide at the sight; it still shocks him to see the strong chevalier so lost and vulnerable. Kai frowns, going over a bit to the chair, laying a hand on the taller man's trembling shoulder.

"I'll look out for you, alright? They won't bug you any more." Haji nods, saying quietly.

"Thank you." Kai nods, giving his shoulder a friendly squeeze, and then heading from the room, after telling him to call him if he needs anything. Haji watches him go; rubbing a hand over his stinging eyes, and lets a sigh escape his lips, leaning over to grab his cello case, tugging it over. Kai then goes to the kitchen to make himself something to eat, and he glares at David when he sees him.

"You need to leave that man alone. He's already going through too much, stop making it worse," Kai's eyes are angry, and David sighs, nodding a bit. Kai then adds as he puts the kettle on,

"Just be glad he's still willing to help you as it is." David sighs again, putting his head in his hands. He knows the teen is right, despite his want to find Saya. Julia puts her hand on his, giving it a squeeze to try and help him calm down, she too has seen how desolate the raven haired chevalier has become, and it's concerning to her, she's worried that not only might their battle with Diva be in danger, but that Haji might end up doing something drastic in his pain. She knows that he is not used to feeling intense emotions like this. As they move toward the table and sit around it, she notices Kai settles himself in the spot where he can see Haji's bedroom door, and she realizes he's looking out for the dark haired man, that he's sitting there so he can keep everyone from bothering Haji, and she finds herself agreeing with him. Haji needs time to himself.

The next morning, they're getting ready to continue searching for Karman. Kai moves to go and grab his jacket, and finds Moses standing in the doorway, hood drawn over his face.

"Moses, are you looking for Karman too?" Kai asks, watching the hooded figure curiously. Lulu peeks around Kai's legs, asking Moses the same, when suddenly the quiet Schiff lunges at Kai, his scythe drawn back to strike. Suddenly Haji is there, using his cello case as a shield to defend his friend. Kai relaxes slightly, and in that instant Moses lunges again, knocking Haji backward, which in turn sends Kai out the window. Using some of his chiropteran speed, Haji rushes outside, catching the redhead before he hits the ground and sets him on his feet. Saya appears then too, her sword drawn as she looks at them. Haji tenses immediately, which Kai sees right away, and he frowns some.

"Run to the light!" Lewis yells at Kai, who nods and starts running, though regretting that it's leaving Haji alone with Saya. Moses chases Kai, and when he reaches the sunlight, he takes a different way, making an abrupt turn down another alley, keeping his senses trained on the redhead. Haji looks away from Saya when he notices her looking at him, his hands clenching into fists, and David calls from the balcony,

"I need you both to follow Kai, make sure he isn't hurt!" Saya nods, and she says quietly,

"Haji, are you coming? Kai needs us." Haji remains silent, but picks up his cello case again, following a bit behind her as they begin to run after the two. Saya sighs as they run, she cal feel how angry and hurt Haji's feeling, and it bothers her, knowing that she's caused it. He'd always been nothing but loyal to her, and she let him get hurt for it. He loves her so much, but she just didn't feel quite the same, even so she didn't want him hurt, but now it's too late, and he won't even look at her. She sighs, focusing on Kai and Moses as they run to the park, well in that general direction. She and Haji split up a bit, searching different ways, and as they make their ways off, Saya notices how tense Haji is and frowns, hoping he can focus on helping Kai. Haji stops at an old oak tree, leaning against the trunk a moment and trying to compose himself. He's seen Saya twice now that the decision was made, and both times he's barely held himself together. He sets his cello case down onto the grass, leaning his head back against the tree and closing his eyes, trying to draw in steadying breaths. Sinking a bit against the trunk until he's sitting on the grass, Haji puts his head in his hands, desperately trying to regain control of himself and his wild emotions.

* * *

><p>Across the park, a dark haired girl looks up from the pad on her lap, seeing the figure sitting against the tree with his head in his hands and she frowns, wondering what could have caused him such agony. With a frown, she flips to a new page, suddenly overcome with a new urge to draw, and she touches her pencil to the page, starting to sketch the man sitting against the tree. She chews her bottom lip as she draws, her jade eyes moving from the paper to him every so often, after a few minutes he lifts his head, looking up at the sky, when she notices his expression, and she's shocked at how sad and lost he looks. When she realizes he's left fifteen minutes later, she checks her drawing, noting she has all the outlining done, so she begins to work on adding in the heavier lines and shading, and finally adding color as well. She sits back when she finishes, gazing down, an intrigued and thoughtful frown on her face as she studies the drawing. The man is quite handsome, wavy dark hair to his shoulders that frames a pale, chisled face, and deep blue eyes, she had seen a glimpse of them as he had looked around. She stays there a bit more, and then packs her bag and heads off, not seeing the redhead on a bench not far away, suddenly get attacked by a scythe wielding man.<p>

* * *

><p>"Moses!" Kai says, frowning as he jumps backward. He soon fires two shots, knocking off the person's hood and exposing him to the sunlight. Moses cries out, immediately hunkering down and trying to cover up as fast as he can, his arms over his head, when suddenly Kai kneels beside him, placing his jacket over Moses, and leading him into the trees. Saya and Haji are nearby, having caught up to them, and Moses soon pulls away, his eyes determined but tired. He goes to fire a red, barbed spike from his hand, but suddenly another person has jumped in front of Kai, taking the spike instead. Kai's eyes widen, and he, Saya and Haji watch as Karman talks to Moses, bringing him back to his senses and calming down, and the two of them soon leave, asking Kai to get their weapons back to Lulu. They watch the two Schiff leave, and soon Saya heads off as well. Kai comes and puts a hand on Haji's arm, worried about him.<p>

"Let's head back, I can tell you need to be alone." Haji nods, turning and following Kai quietly as they head back to the apartment. As they walk, Kai glances back at the quiet chevalier off and on, Haji's still there behind him, but his eyes remain on the ground and his shoulders are hunched, nothing like the once proud and regal man Kai is used to seeing. When they get to the apartment, Kai actually has to grab Haji's arm so that he doesn't keep walking right by. Haji startles slightly, but doesn't pull away, silently letting Kai lead him inside and to his bedroom, where he nods a little and disappears inside. Kai chews his lip, bringing Lulu to the front room where he's set Moses and Karman's weapons on a table, and she begins to cry. Saya is there too, having wanted to talk to David, and she frowns too at the crying girl.

"I'm going to make sure no one ever has to cry like this again." Kai says softly as he wraps a gentle arm around Lulu's shoulders, and Saya nods a bit too. Kai glances at her, and then back down at Lulu, and he goes over to the couch with Lulu, sitting down with her and letting her curl up beside him as he tries to calm her.

"Kai, where's Haji?" Saya asks softly, and he looks over at her.

"Resting, please leave him be." She sighs, but nods, returning to the kitchen for some tea, and then as the other Red Shield members come in, everyone settles in the living room to talk about the final plan for Diva at her show in a few days. Everyone but Haji, who remains in his room and Kai makes sure no one bothers him in there. They continue discussing the plan of taking out the satellites that will be broadcasting Diva live over the world. Some of them will be inside, and others outside. Kai agrees to relay the information to Haji later on so that he can still rest. Kai leans back into the couch, Lulu now sleeping beside him as he listens to what he's going to be doing on the show night, where he'll be and who he'll be with.

That night after everyone has either left or gone to bed, Kai makes a cup of tea, and heads down to Haji's room, knocking on the door, telling Haji it's him.

"It's open." Haji's soft, deep voice calls, and Kai pushes open the door, finding Haji again curled up in the chair, the blanket around him as he gazes out the window.

"I brought you some tea." Haji looks over, brushing some hair out of his eyes and nodding. Kai moves closer and hands him the mug, and Haji thanks him quietly, taking it and sipping it. Kai sits down, telling him of the plans that were made, and the part David has asked he do in it. Haji nods as he listens.

"Alright, I will be there." He says, and Kai nods, putting a hand on Haji's shoulder, and then heading from the room. Haji continues sipping his tea as he watches the sky, the blanket still wrapped around him, and his knees drawn up to his chest again. He sighs, still thinking about how he'd had to go with Saya, and how it'd just made him hurt all over again.

_'__How __can __I __keep __the __promise __to __Saya, __when __now __I __can__'__t __even __face __her __without __practically __falling __apart __at __the __seams?_' he sighs, gazing down into his mug and swirling the tea a bit, barely feeling the tear as it makes a trail down his cheek. He soon sets down the mug and pulls his blanket tighter, sighing sadly as he looks back at the sky. He soon pulls over his cello case, carefully taking out the instrument and standing it against him, while pulling out the bow as well, and starts to play softly.

* * *

><p>Over the next several days, Haji doesn't come out of his room at all, and the only one he allows inside is Kai. Kai brings him tea sometimes, or just comes in to talk with him a bit and see how he's doing. He can see the pain in Haji's eyes every time he looks at him, seeing just how heartbroken the quiet chevalier really is, and it really worries him. Lulu is still staying there as well; Kai has taken her under his wing and is looking after her as well. Kai and the rest of Shield are currently finalizing last minute plans; David is talking to Joel about how they're all getting there and getting set up. Kai has just finished cleaning his dad's gun, and slips it into the old holster he now wears at his side. He reaches up, fingering the pendant he wears around his neck; the red gem is a crystal from his brother Riku's body.<p>

"Watch over us, little brother." He finds himself whispering, getting up as everyone grabs jackets and things, getting ready to go. Kai heads down the hall and knocks on the closed door.

"Haji, it's time to head out." He calls. The door opens, revealing the raven haired chevalier, cello case over his shoulder, ready to go. Haji nods at Kai, following the redhead outside. Kai notices that not only does Haji stay close to him; he also keeps his head down, refusing to look at or talk to anyone else there. David goes around making sure everyone is ready, and they head to the opera house. David and Julia watch from above as Haji follows Kai into the opera house, and Julia says,

"It's almost as if… Haji has started serving Kai instead of Saya." And David nods as he watches both of them head inside to their designated spots. Kai sees Saya as well, but Haji avoids her eyes, stepping around to Kai's other side, his hair falling into his eyes again. They go to their seats, and wait for the signal that Diva's arrived at the building. Kai and Saya talk some, while Haji remains in the shadows, keeping to himself and then walking off a bit, still keeping silent.

"I'm not mad at you Saya, I'm just worried about Haji, and he's really hurting." Kai says to his sister, in response to her asking if he was mad at her. She nods, relaxing just a little, but refrains from looking over into the shadows where Haji is. The first performers come onstage soon after, so everyone settles back to watch the show, still waiting for the signal, which comes near the end. Kai and Haji head to their positions while she gets up and heads down another hallway to confront her sister, Diva. Soon Diva makes her entrance despite their efforts to stop her and she begins to sing. Before long screams and roars are filling the opera house as people change into chiropterans all over the place. Saya has begun fighting Amshel, who was posing as Diva, and he'd distracted her from her real target. Haji soon joins the fight, and Saya nods, running off to confront Diva, as Haji fights Amshel, using his cello case as a shield. Inside Kai and Lewis are holding their own against some of the chiropterans, when Diva finishes singing, to find Saya standing onstage with her sword, glaring at her. Saya charges her, sword drawn, and they begin to fight. Kai soon heads off to check on the other Shield members in the opera house, concerned the most about Haji. He ends up detoured by chiropterans and runs into David nearby, and they all end up making their way back to the stage area, where Saya and Diva are battling together on the stage. Suddenly Haji drops down from the ceiling, and goes to draw and throw a dagger toward Diva on the stage, but her chevalier, Nathan, sitting in a front seat with a basket beside him containing her babies, his arms crossed as he watches, stops Haji, telling him to look and watch. Haji pauses, turning to look at the two sisters battling, his heart clenching when he sees Saya. Both girls are cut and bleeding in places, but neither of the girls is willing to back down.

"Why… is it only me?" Diva stammers as she begins to crystallize not long after, she and Saya had both stabbed each other with blood coated swords, but only Diva's body has begun crystallizing. She reaches out to her babies as Nathan sets the cocoons beside her, touching one of them before she fades. Saya then moves to stand over them, readying her sword over one baby's forehead, as they had just hatched. Kai calls out to her to stop, to live and not die, and Haji tenses, looking away, unable to face Saya. Solomon then arrives, and with a desperate plea he convinces Saya to live. Nathan then approaches, asking Saya to kill him, as with Diva dead he has nothing left, and she obliges. Suddenly Amshel crashes through the roof, and attempts to attack; Haji intercepts it, which results in his left arm being torn off, which both Saya and Kai cry out at. He looks at Saya just once, his eyes sad and lost.

"I've always loved you." He says quietly, and the section of roof above collapses in on top of him, and Amshel. David gets the rest moving, Kai and Saya each carrying a baby as they run from the opera house's now crumbling structure. Solomon runs with them, knowing Saya needs him right now as well as her family and her friends. None of them knowing if the raven haired chevalier is alive or not.

Outside the opera house a few hours later, the dark haired girl from the park, Krystina, arrives to an awful sight. The opera house is in ruins, and the smell of blood and death is everywhere. As she looks around, her foot bumps something, and when she looks down, her eyes widen at the sight of a black and silver case for a cello, styled as a coffin. She gasps, recognizing it as the one the guy at the park had several days ago. There's a crack in the side of it, but overall it's still in good shape, and she starts looking around more too, wondering if he might be here as well. She picks up the heavy case, putting it over her shoulder, deciding to bring it while she looks around the ruins. She's about to give up, when she spots some stones moving, and a hand coming out and pushing them away. She runs over, starting to pull them off, revealing the head and shoulders of the man she'd seen at the park.

"Oh god, are you okay?" she asks worriedly, seeing how badly hurt he is. Haji only moans a bit, his mind foggy with pain and dizziness. She helps move the rocks, and he shakily stands up, only to collapse. She gasps a bit and darts forward, catching him, though her touch saves him from hitting the ground, he also hisses too a bit, obviously in immense pain. She puts his arm around her shoulders, and slips hers around his waist to steady him as she leads him out of the ruins, the cello case still on her back. Slowly, she leads him to her loft, guiding him into the elevator and hitting the button for her floor. Once there she leads him inside, and she places the cello in her room as she does. She then guides him to the bathroom and sits him down, running to grab towels and cloths and an old bathrobe an ex boyfriend had left there and returning to the bathroom. She notices his left arm is in bad shape, as it looks like it had nearly been severed, unaware that it had and had been retrieved and placed back by Haji before he had collapsed, unconscious in the rubble. She gently peels off his bloodied and ruined clothes, helping him sit in the bathtub. He leans back into the wall, in so much pain its like nothing is registering, like he's in a daze. She cleans him up as well as she can, washing his hair as well, and then she has him get out of the tub with her help and she helps him into a pair of clean under shorts and the robe, leading him to her room, laying him in the bed. She bandages his wounds, and then pulls up the blanket as he drifts off again, so that it rests just about his mid chest. She chews her lip.

"What happened to you..?" she says softly, gently brushing his hair out of his eyes. She makes herself a bed on the floor so she can stay nearby to keep an eye on him during the night, and soon settles down, pulling out her pad and pencils, and starting to draw him as he sleeps, unable to sleep herself.

Back at the apartment, Kai sips a cup of tea while watching Saya and the babies sleeping in her room, a bit of a frown on his lips. Solomon lies beside her, his arm around her, sleeping as well. Kai can see that she's happy with the blond, and he doesn't want her to be unhappy, he just wishes that it hadn't meant the breaking of Haji's heart in the process. Kai looks out at the window, gazing at the stars, and he says quietly,

"Haji, where ever you are, I hope you are okay and that perhaps you've even found peace." Saya stirs in her sleep as if she heard his whisper, but then she settles back down, snuggling into Solomon. Kai heads out of the room, heading to bed himself.

'See you someday, Haji.' He thinks as he drifts off to sleep himself.

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><p><strong>Well there it is, I hope it was enjoyable. :) Please review and let me know, all feedback is welcome encouragement!<strong>

**Sani.**


	2. New Starts and Old Pains

**Hello, I apologize for this taking so long with this, I had a lot of distractions. Please tell me what you think, and I also want to thank those who have left reviews and Favorited this story. I hope it continues to do well. :)**

"Blah" - Talking

'Blah' - Thinking

**Disclaimer: **As usual, I don't own Blood+ or it's characters, only Krystina and my plot. LOL though I wouldn't mind Haji. :P

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><p>A couple weeks later, Krys looks up from a book as the raven haired man stirs in her bed. He has not woken up since she found him. It worries her, he should have woken up already, and his injuries are healing so slowly, too slowly to at that. She can already tell he is not human, evidence being his clawed right hand, as she had taken off his bandages on it when she cleaned and dressed his wounds. She had heard of the awful blood sucking creatures before, hearing several news reports about them, and then seeing them on TV when all hell broke loose during the opera show.<p>

She chews her lip, setting down her book and getting up, going over and sitting down on the edge of the bed. She sighs, wishing he would open his eyes and tell her he's okay, but they stay closed in deep sleep, his expression though is sad, almost lost. She notices also that his deep, even breathing has become a little quiet and shallow to her ears, and he's gotten paler as well. She sighs worriedly, wishing she knew what to do. When he hadn't woken after the first couple days she had panicked some, wondering if she should be getting him to a hospital. But as the days went by and he continued to sleep deeply, no signs of his body shutting down in the way a normal human's would, she began to relax. Now though, she's worried again. His lost, lonely expression is making her wonder if possibly he's lost his will to live. She reaches down, gently brushing his black hair out of his closed eyes, wishing she knew what to do for him, how to help him.

"What could have broken you so badly..?" she whispers as she watches him, wondering. She leans back a bit against the headboard, thinking, wondering if because of him not being human, if he needs blood like the other creatures do. She chews her lip, wondering if she should try giving him a little of her blood to see if that would help or not. She soon gets up, deciding to make herself something to eat, also wanting to think on this a bit more as well. She heads into the kitchen and peeks in the fridge, debating the contents a few minutes, and then deciding on some left over spaghetti from last night, heating it up. Sighing a bit, she returns to the room and sits by the bed as she eats, watching the sleeping young man. After she finishes she leans some against the bed, resting her chin on her arms as she watches him, worrying her bottom lip between her teeth as she does it due to thinking.

"Oww!" she hisses a bit after, realizing she has bitten her lip hard enough to draw blood as she thinks about the young man. She sighs, licking it away and wincing slightly at the coppery taste. She frowns a bit, and then touches a finger to the tiny wound, bringing it down and seeing red on it, and curious, she brings her red stained finger to the young man's nose, which twitches slightly. Her eyes widen a bit, so she sucks her lip in her mouth, working out a mouthful of blood from her injured lip, and then she slowly leans down. She hesitates at first, and then presses her lips to his, gently working the blood into his mouth, and then lightly massaging down his throat to encourage him to swallow it. She then pulls back, chewing her lip yet again as she watches him lay there. She takes his human hand in hers, still watching him sleep, when she notices him swallow lightly again, as if he's trying to get more in. She hesitates, and then leans over to her dinner tray, picking up the steak knife by the plate she had used to slice garlic bread, and sitting back again. She looks at her wrist, wiping off the knife and then making a small cut with it, and then she brings it up to his lips, letting the blood seep into his mouth. There's nothing at first, but as she's about to give up; going to move her arm, she suddenly feels a soft, gentle suckling against the wound. She gasps bit, watching as the young man suckles at her wrist, even though he still appears to be asleep, he hasn't moved his arms or anything, she is relieved though at the response she's getting from him, it was blood he had needed. As she watches him feed from her, she begins to lightly run her fingers through his dark, wavy hair, and she whispers.

"Don't give up; please… don't give up on everything yet." She also notices that his color is improving a great deal as he drinks as well, and soon she retracts her wrist gently, bandaging it, and wiping a bit of blood in her hand away, as well as from the corner of his mouth. She clears her dishes, and settles down on her bedroll with a book, beginning to read while still keeping an eye on the sleeping man. She ends up drifting to sleep, her book on her stomach, and her head to the side facing the sleeping man.

Later that night, Haji groans and stirs, deep blue eyes fluttering open. He goes to move, soft, painful whimpers escaping his lips as his injuries make themselves known with a vengeance. Haji groans, resting back in to the pillow and sighing a bit. He looks around the room, not knowing where he is, and feeling a little worried about it. Before long though, the pain is making him dizzy, and he soon is returned to darkness as his weak and battered body loses consciousness. Krys stirs as well, but does not wake, her face still turned toward the dark haired man asleep in her bed.

The next morning when she wakes up, she checks on the young man, finding him still pale, though his color has improved, and his injuries have healed slightly. She smiles a little and goes about her morning activity of showering and dressing, and then she fixes herself some breakfast, which she brings back to the bed room and sits beside the bed. Lifting a small knife she brought, she unbandages her wrist and reopens the small cut there. She first takes some into her mouth, pressing her lips to his and transferring it to him. She waits for the swallowing motion in his throat, and then brings her wrist to his lips, smiling some as within a couple minutes; a soft suckling feeling comes over it as he begins to feed. She can tell he's still unconscious for the most part of things, but when she starts to hum softly; he turns his head slightly, as if looking for the sound. She smiles and eats her breakfast as she watches him feed from her wrist, his lips are soft against her pale skin. She smiles, he seems to be finally getting better. She finishes her own breakfast while watching him, and when she feels right on the edge of faint, she retracts her wrist and puts the bandage back on. She then sits back, just resting and watching him a bit as he sleeps, wondering when he'll wake up fully.

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><p>Over the next few days, Krys has been letting him feed from her wrist twice a day, and due to having the blood, his wounds are healing much faster now, his color is much better too, so now, she is merely waiting for him to wake up. She's currently on her bedroll, art supplies spread around her as she draws the young man again as he sleeps. She has a number of drawings of him now, he entrances her and she wanted to capture the beauty he exhibits. She's currently working on adding color; the strokes of her pencils are gentle and carefully controlled. She startles when she hears a soft groan, setting down her pad and pencil and looking over at her sleeping guest. She frowns, getting up and going over to the bed, seeing that his eyes are squeezed shut, and a frown covers his lips. She says softly,<p>

"Shh, you're safe now, it's alright." And his head turns a bit. She chews her lip, watching as his closed eyes slowly flutter open, revealing a deep, mesmerizing blue.

"W-where am I?" he asks, his voice soft and hoarse from disuse. She gently reaches out, brushing hair out of his eyes and smiling a little.

"My loft apartment, I brought you here when I found you in the ruins of the opera house. My name is Krystina by the way." He gazes up at her, studying her a bit, and then nodding a little.

"You've been through a great deal." She says softly, taking his hand in hers. He looks at their hands as they rest on the bed, and then back up at her, and he nods, his eyes filling with sadness. She chews her lip, her eyes filling with worry; he looks so sad and lost. She then asks softly,

"What's your name?" and he looks up again, pulling the blankets around him some more.

"Haji." He says softly, sighing some as he gazes out the window. She chews her lip some, wondering at what it was that's broken him this way, made him so sad and lost, but she doesn't want to press him.

Haji sighs again, gazing outside, his mind running rampant with thoughts. He misses Saya terribly, and it saddens him that he will never be near her again. Kai was a good friend as well, looking out for him after he had been left alone. He sits up against the headboard, drawing his knees to his chest and pulling the blankets tightly around himself. He sees the concern in this girl's eyes, but he's unsure why she cares about him, or why she'd taken care of him. Haji watches the girl as she soon heads from the room with some dishes, likely from a recent meal, and he gazes around the room, deep blue eyes taking in everything, and soon coming to rest upon his cello case in the corner and he sighs a little in relief. He also notices a keyboard not far from it, and thinks he might ask her to play something for him, as he misses both hearing and playing music. When she returns and sits by the bed again, he notices her bandaged wrist and his eyes widen.

"Were you… giving me...?" and she startles a little, but nods.

"My blood? Yes… I was. I realized you needed it when your wounds were not healing." He looks down some again, frowning. He hates drinking blood; he's terrified of losing control of himself. She then looks down at her hands, his sad eyes almost too much to bear. Haji lets out a soft sigh, looking back out the window, and then says,

"May I have my cello please?" and she nods, getting up and retrieving the case, bringing it back across the room to the bed, setting it beside him. She sits back down afterwards. Haji opens the case, lightly running a hand across the smooth, polished wood of the instrument; memories rushing back as he does. The first time he touched a cello, Saya teaching him to play, him playing for her, numerous memories. He sighs some, pulling a finger across the strings lightly and closing his eyes to the sound. He then sits up, moving over to the bed side and standing up the instrument. He glances at the girl, and then back down, beginning to softly play, the music just flowing out of him. He notices out of the corner of his eye that she's now got her eyes closed as she now listens to the music, and to his surprise she actually begins to softly hum along to the song he's playing. Strewn across the floor, he also notices several blank papers, and some drawings as he looks around a bit while playing and he's surprised to see more than one of the drawings are of him laying in sleep. When she catches where his gaze has landed, she blushes, looking at her hands again, a soft blush over her cheeks. Haji finds himself gazing in surprise at the pictures, her talent is amazing, to have captured him so well. He stops the bow across some of the strings, saying softly.

"I am flattered, you have incredible talent." She nods, blushing a bit again, and then she soon goes to her keyboard, turning it on, and then looking back at him. He gazes at her a moment, and begins to play again a bit, and then his eyes widen some when she begins to play as well, blending right in with his song. He recovers a bit and continues playing, finding the sound very interesting combined with her keyboard playing. Haji looks up as she stops playing when he does; noticing she's blushing slightly, shy about her playing. She soon looks over at the clock, and gets up, leaving the room. Haji's eyes widen when she comes back in a moment later, a tray with two cups of tea balanced in one hand, and a small knife in the other. She sits by the bed, handing him one cup of tea, and sipping the other, fiddling with the knife in her other hand. She says softly,

"Um, Haji… this is about the time I… was giving you some blood at night." He gasps slightly, blue eyes widening again. She slowly unwinds the bandage on her wrist, revealing two small, partially healed wounds. Haji sighs and looks down at his hands.

"I… don't like taking blood, I…" he sighs some, "I'm afraid of… losing control." Her eyes widen a bit as she gasps in surprise, chewing her lip. She takes his hand again, and looking into his eyes, she says softly,

"I trust you Haji, you need this to finish healing." His blue eyes widen, she trusts him? She hardly even knows him and yet she trusts him? Haji takes a deep breath, trying to calm his nerves, and then he nods slowly, his clawed hand clutching the sheets a bit nervously. She uses the knife to reopen one of the small wounds on her arm, and she raises it to his lips. He looks at her, into her eyes, and then lowers his lips to her arm, starting to suckle at it softly, being as gentle as he can. He soon grips her arm with his human hand, still making sure he doesn't bite her too hard or drink too deeply, and he keeps watching her the whole time. She smiles a little, as she watches him feed, and then finds herself lightly running her fingers through his hair, wanting to show that she trusts him. He tenses slightly, but then begins to relax with her touches, surprising himself. When he pulls back, he wipes his mouth a bit, blushing slightly as she cleans and re wraps her wrist. He feels his fangs are still lowered as he wipes the blood away, and they soon recede again, and he settles back, pulling the blankets back around himself. She smiles a bit, and the two of them finish their tea, talking a little, though Haji is soon over come by a flood of memories and to her surprise begins to cry softly, and not even thinking about it, she gently moves to his side, pulling him into her arms. Haji tenses, startled at the touch, not having expected her to get up and do this, but he soon finds himself leaning into her, letting the sobs and pent up emotion just pour from him in waves. She suddenly says softly,

"Your heart… it's been broken." And Haji looks up at her, seeing her sad, sympathetic eyes that she's been watching him with, and he nods a little, and then curls back up, pulling his blanket tighter. She begins to hum softly, running a hand lightly up and down his back, and Haji finds himself curling closer, a bit surprised in how much he's wanting this comfort, this gentle touch and soothing voice. He ends up actually drifting in and out of sleep for a while, before falling asleep fully, still curled into her arms. She moves a bit and leans back as she does a bit, resting against the headboard, Haji still in her arms. She fixes the blanket around him, and then she begins to softly hum, still very gently running a hand up and down his back.

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><p>A few weeks later, Haji is still staying at Krystina's as currently he doesn't have anywhere to go, the wounds from what happened with Saya are still too strong and deep for him to return to Okinawa right now in his opinion, and he's growing comfortable with being around Krystina. He's pretty much healed now, well all of his physical wounds have, though as he was healing, there were a few times he was too afraid to feed from her blood, so she'd ended up giving him some in his sleep instead. The other day Haji had gone to the Red Shield's old apartment to get a couple of things he had left there, and found a letter from Kai on the bed, saying that they're all okay there, and also that Saya had gone into her hibernation cycle a week ago too, and the twins are doing okay, in case he'd been wondering. Haji never sent any answer back, still too hurt by everything. Krystina had told him to take as much time as he needs, to not hurry and rush into anything, just reminding him that he needs to take the time to let his mind, heart and soul continue healing.<p>

Currently he's sitting on the window ledge of her living room, gazing outside as she draws another yet another picture of him. They had just finished one of their now regular sessions of playing music together, her keyboard blended with his cello, something they have come to enjoy doing together. She's humming softly, and Haji closes his eyes, feeling soothed by the soft sound he's hearing, letting himself relax as he listens. When he opens his eyes again he notices she has a bit of a smile as she draws, his image slowly coming alive on the page. He watches as she finishes, and he soon brings his cello over too, beginning to play, losing himself in the music as she works on the shading of her drawing, and letting her soft humming blend with his music.

"Haji," she suddenly asks softly, "are you alright?" and he pauses and looks up, looking at her in slight confusion. She sets down her pad, getting up and coming over, concern in her eyes. As he watches her, gently she reaches up, touching his cheek, which he then realizes is wet, he was crying and he didn't even realize. He sighs some, looking down. She asks gently,

"Was this a song you… played for Saya?" and Haji's eyes widen as he realizes just which song he'd been playing, and he nods, his hair falling into his eyes. She nods, gently slipping an arm around him and she rubs his side gently a bit, feeling bad for how much pain the man is going through. Haji lets a shaky sigh pass his lips, his eyes closing as another tear rolls down his cheek.

"Oh Haji." She says softly, turning and hugging him, and he surprises himself by not resisting her at all when she does. He lays his head on her shoulder, sighing again as he hides his face, trying to gain control of his emotions. She starts to hum softly, a lullaby they had discovered has quite a calming effect on Haji when sang softly to him by her. She runs a hand up and down his back, and he lets himself relax, slowly calming down with her touch and voice. He normally doesn't like showing his emotions, especially how hurt and betrayed he feels, but Krys has shown him that it's okay to show what he feels, and she never judges him, she's just there for him whenever he needs it. When he calms, he lifts his head, wiping his eyes and taking a breath. She smiles, pushing a lock of hair behind his ear.

"Are you alright now?" she asks softly, and he nods. She nods too, soon returning to her drawing, and Haji resumes playing his cello, a different, softer song this time. After dinner, Haji heads in for a shower, Krys deciding to sit on the patio while he does, watching the stars as they're starting to come out. She plans to get a look at Haji's nearly healed wounds; she does every night, to make sure no problems have come up during his healing. She's also concerned, it seems like now that he's almost healed from his wounds, his adversity and fear of taking her blood seems to be increasing. She sighs some, wishing she could help him to not be so afraid of it the way he is, but so far it hasn't worked. She leans back on the chair, closing her eyes as she lets her mind go wandering a bit, and thinking of things.

Haji sighs contentedly, relaxing as the hot water beats against his skin, thinking about how things are going right now. He has a place to stay, a new friend who cares about him, and no one is pressuring or rushing him to do anything. He doesn't like though that now that he's almost healed his fear of drinking blood has only intensified, and it really bothers him. Krys has been nothing but nice to him, but he thinks part of his aversion might be the taste of her blood. When he had first fed from her while awake and coherent, the taste of blood from her was nearly intoxicating, like nothing he's ever tasted before, and it frightens him, because with such a shattered heart and soul, he's afraid getting close to her will only end badly. He washes his hair and body, he then leans against the shower wall, closing his eyes and relaxing under the hot water. When he finishes up, he's more relaxed from the hot water, and he dries himself off and changes, putting his laundry in the hamper, and then heading back out to the living room. He sees Krys lying in the chaise on the balcony and he smiles and he comes up behind her, watching her for a few moments. She looks up at him and smiles some, scooting over and patting beside her on the chair, and he nods, settling beside her. He relaxes as she smiles, putting her blanket over him a bit, resting her head against his shoulder as they watch the sky, looking at the stars and just talking softly. He closes his eyes when she begins to hum softly, her voice soothing him nearly to sleep, and he hears as she sighs a bit, just barely catching it in his half asleep state, she 's content to be out here with him, the both of them relaxed and enjoying each other's company.

Haji groans softly a bit later as he feels her shake him awake, and he opens his eyes, startling slightly as a cold raindrop lands on his cheek. He sits up tiredly, getting up and allowing her to guide him inside, and to the bed, where he lays down and curls onto his side. He sees her smile a little as she pulls the blanket over him, and then she retreats to her own bedroll, laying back and picking up her book. Haji lies there, watching her as she reads through a few strands of his dark hair, until sleep claims him again. Krys looks over at him and smiles some. She soon gets up, coming over and gently pushing the blankets down to his waist, carefully sliding up his loose t-shirt, and starting to gently check the wounds, lightly running her finger over the scars on his pale and smooth skin, the softness of it still surprises her. Satisfied that all is well, she puts his shirt back down and lies the blankets back up over him and returns to her bedroll, soon falling asleep herself to the sound of the rain's now steady pattering against the patio doors and windows.

The next morning she yawns and sits up, smiling a bit when she sees Haji is still sleeping, though then she sighs when she sees it's still raining heavily. She gets up, heading to the kitchen to start some tea and make breakfast, washing up before she does. She gazes out at the rain a bit as she cooks some bacon and eggs, both loving the rain, yet a bit saddened they can't venture outside anywhere due to how heavy it is. As she sets the tray up to take her breakfast to the bed room, she lays her small knife and roll of bandage over on the edge of the tray. She sighs, knowing Haji needs another feeding to finish his healing, but worried about how to get him to take the blood from her with how much his fear has intensified.

In the bed room Haji stirs awake, his blue eyes gazing out at the rain. He sits up, wrapping his blanket around his shoulders as he sits up against the headboard, resting his chin on his arms, which he's got laying on his knees. He sighs, suddenly remembering how Saya loved to watch the rain, and he sighs, hiding in his arms as a tremor of sadness runs through him and he tries to force his memories away, not wanting to shed more tears again. He still has his head down on his arms when Krys comes back, and he lifts his head when she sits down a bit on the bed. His eyes widen when he sees the knife and bandage though, and he shakes his head, backing up against the headboard, fear evident in his eyes. She frowns some; putting a hand on his arm in what she hopes is a comforting manner. Haji chews his lip, watching her nervously as she sets the tray down on the night stand beside the bed.

"Haji," she says softly, "you know you need this to finish healing. I trust you, remember?" Haji winces a bit; he doesn't even quite understand why he's so afraid. Sure his theory about the taste of her blood is viable as a reason, but he isn't sure. The more healed he gets, the more afraid he finds himself of taking her blood to finish healing. Krys tucks a lock of hair behind his ear, running her fingers through the silky, raven strands, his shoulders begin to tremble slightly, watching as she makes the small cut on her wrist, lifting it to his lips. Haji's eyes widen again and he scoots back more, hitting the headboard again, and she chews her lip, using her other hand to gently rub his side, offering comfort. He sighs and looks down, hair falling into his eyes as he slumps in defeat, though he's still afraid. She gently wraps her good arm around him, gently bringing him to where he has come to rest against her side. He nuzzles into her shoulder, still trembling a bit in his fear. She continues with gently rubbing his side, and he finds himself relaxing a bit, though fear remains in his eyes. She gives him a few moments, and then gently brings her wrist to his mouth. Taking a deep breath, Haji closes his lips around it, his eyes fluttering closed as the coppery taste fills his mouth. He leans into her still, her touches still soothing him as he begins to feed, suckling gently at the wound. She also begins to softly hum again, and Haji finds himself a bit more relaxed, and he continues to relax with the humming and her gently rubbing his side. He leans closer to her, feeling soothed, and his eyes remain closed as he feeds, but then suddenly he finds thirst getting much stronger, and unknowingly begins drinking deeper, so lost in it he doesn't hear her soft whimper as his slender fangs push a bit deeper into her wrist. His grip also tightens just a bit, and her eyes widen.

"H-Haji…" she says softly, trying to catch his attention, realizing that if she doesn't stop him soon, he will lose control, and that's what he had been afraid of. She still rubs his side, and she turns her wrist a bit, to try and get him to let go, and suddenly he does, gasping, blue eyes wide.

"Oh god, oh no..." he says softly, burying his head in his arms as his shoulders tremble. She frowns, his despair over this making her feel so sad for him. She bandages her wrist, and then wraps both arms around his slender frame, drawing him close to her again. He hides in her shoulder, and she can feel the warm wetness of his tears there as he curls closer, still berating himself over and over for such a small loss of control. She rubs his back gently, doing her best to offer comfort, and her eyes widen as he says softly,

"I-I'm nothing… u-useless… I-I ran away f-from her… a-and now t-this…" and she gasps, realizing what he means. How he told her about when he lost his one arm, and had run away from Saya afterward, and from a fear as well, the fear of being unworthy, and how he's been berating and punishing himself ever since that day. And now he's berating himself for this small slip just as badly.

"No Haji, you're not. You aren't worthless at all, never. I promise." He looks up at her, his blue eyes all red rimmed and a bit puffy, and she smiles slightly, using her thumbs to gently wipe the tears from his cheeks a bit.

"R-really?" he asks, sitting up a little and wiping at his eyes to dry them the rest of the way. She nods, brushing his hair back gently, running her fingers through it, and he lays his head back on her shoulder as they stay there, and she begins to hum softly again. He stays curled close, but he still can't help feeling horrible in regard to what had almost happened, and now he's afraid more than ever to touch her blood at all. Sighing in frustration, Haji closes his eyes again, keeping his face hidden. His tears have stopped, but he still feels badly about what happened, or rather almost happened.

Still humming softly, Krys gazes out at the rain, trying to think of something for them to do that can cheer Haji up, he's still pretty shaken. She leans over a bit, pulling her keyboard closer to the bed, and with an adjustment to her position that doesn't bother Haji, she begins to play using one hand, playing a soft tune she knows Haji enjoys and finds calming. Haji lifts his head a bit later, the music calming him, and after a bit more he pulls over his cello, setting it up and beginning to play along with her, the two of them saying nothing, their music filling the air. A while later she heads to the kitchen to make some dinner and some fresh tea, while he moves to the chair in the bedroom, curling up with the blanket and watching the rain as it storms outside, the storm had started not long ago, and Haji watches silently as lightning arcs through the air, thunder booming as the rain continues to pour down in sheets. Haji sighs, the storm seems to suit his moods lately, every time that he feels down, it's like a storm is brewing in his heart. He then finds himself thinking about how she had pulled him close and comforted him, and told him that he isn't worthless.

'_If __I __am __not __worthless __though, __then __why __did __I __run __from __Saya __that __night __in __Vietnam? __Why __am __I __so __afraid __to __take __blood __from __Krystina __in __order __to __heal? __Why, __if __I__'__m __not __worthless, __why __did __Saya __not __choose __me? __Why __did __I __hurt __so __damn __badly __when __she __chose __that __Solomon? __Why? __Why __am __I __always __the __one __left __behind? __Why __does __no __one __think __of __me? __I __do __not __understand __why __this __is __happening. __Why __does __Krystina __take __care __of __me, __why __is __she __so __nice __to __me? __What __have __I __ever __done __to __deserve __any __of __this? __Why __can__'__t __I __see __what __she__'__s __telling __me? __She __promised __me __in __total __trust __that __I __am __not __useless, __worthless __or __nothing, __so __why__… __can__'__t __I __see __that? __Why __must __I __have __no __courage __to __believe, __why __must __I __berate __myself __so? __Why __am __I__… __unable __to __accept __what __she __told __me?__'_

He puts his head into his hands, sighing sadly as his eyes sting once again, so many things running through his mind. Every time that it happens like this, that his thoughts run rampant, it's always the self loathing thoughts. All these thoughts get him beating himself up inside, belittling himself, draining any confidence to nothing. Just like his love for Saya had been worth nothing. He had given her everything, and all that'd happened in return was he lost everything he held dear. Saya is gone, his friends are gone, and he's alone. More alone that he's ever felt, even during the other times Saya had been sleeping, he feels so much more alone now. Even though Krys has been helping him greatly, he still feels so alone inside. So empty and numb that it hurts, and he's too afraid to do anything about it. He pulls the blanket tighter and closes his eyes, listening to the rain as he lets his thoughts go. He becomes so lost in all of them that he doesn't even feel the tear that slips down his cheek, followed by another.

"Saya…" he whispers, giving in to the despair that's overwhelming him as tears continue to slide down his pale cheeks, his shoulders trembling beneath the blanket. He pulls it tighter, the sound of the rain his only comfort as he sobs softly, the pain he had been trying to overcome, instead overcoming him in a flood. Sighing sadly, he curls up, the blanket drawn tightly.

Krys finishes up making some supper, some steak and rice, watching the rain while she cooks, and she hopes the power doesn't go out. She makes plates for each of them, setting them on a tray, along with cutlery and glasses, and making her way into the bedroom. When she comes in, her eyes widen when she sees Haji over in the chair, nearly hidden by the blanket as he trembles with pain wracked sobs, and mumbling 'Saya' over and over again. She frowns, setting down the tray and moving to his side, sitting on the arm of the chair and gently pulling him into her arms. He tenses at first, but then leans into her, hiding his face right away, she can tell he feels ashamed of breaking down again, that he feels weak for letting himself cry as much as he has already, all the time he's been there so far.

"Oh Haji, one day you'll see." She says softly, running her fingers through his hair, starting to hum her soft song as she does, gazing out at the drumming rain. She decides they can eat a bit later, right now he just needs her to be there for him just like she has been. His fear of taking her blood is temporarily not an issue at the moment, his despair a much more pressing matter. She keeps comforting him, sure that one day he will see at last his true worth and meaning, though she knows he still has much healing ahead of him. Humming a song softly, she settles on the arm of the chair, keeping the raven haired man close as despair reigns over him, she's intent to stay there for as long as he needs her, and the slight tightening of one of his hands on the sleeve of her shirt seems to tell her he knows that too.

"We'll see what tomorrow brings." She says softly, turning to gaze back out at the rain, her fingers in his hair still, gently running through it as she softly hums, wishing she could protect him from all pain.

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><p><strong>Well that's chapter two, I hope it was as good as the first, please review and tell me what you think, it gives encouragement! :)<strong>

**-Sani.**


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